Relationships

To Tell or Not to Tell

2012-01-18T01:05:00.000-08:00

Experts will disagree on how much of a personŝs past should be shared in a relationship and while some things probably should be shared, most people lean more to not sharing every aspect of the past. First, it is the past. Think back to how much people grow through the teen years to mid-twenties. Offering unnecessary information from the past is a great way to create distrust, insecurity, and more questions than answers. Be wise when sharing.

Respect Privacy

When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history. There are yearbooks, maybe love letters from a first love, other objects that may not seem important to one person but to the owner, they have a special meaning. It is important to respect the privacy of your mateŝs “stuff.” Do not dig through boxes of things owned by your mate out of curiosity. Instead, allow them to bring those things out if they feel it is necessary. By helping yourself, you are disrespecting something sacred to your mate, which is not healthy for any relationship.

2011-10-05T13:02:00.000-07:00

Ruedos figuros

Figūra	Tarimas	Vertimas, paaiškinimas

Guapea	Guapea	Guapo = gražus. Jungiamasis žingsnis
Para abajo	Para abacho	Atgal, žemyn
Para arriba	Ariba	Pirmyn, aukštyn
Un Tarro	Un Taro	Ąsotis
Un Tarro descarado	Un taro deskarado	Ąsotis (nepaleidžiant rankų)
Exhibela	Egzibelia	parodyk ją. Merginos posūkis po ranka.
Dile que no	Dile ke no	Pasakyk jai, kad ne
Dame una	Dame (una)	Duok man (viena)
Dame dos	Dame dos	Duok man du (dvi)
Dos con dos	Dos kon dos	Kaip dame dos, tik praeidami suplojam du kart
Enchufla	Enčiuflia	Įjunk ją
Enchufla Castigala ( doble )	Enčiuflia kastigala ( doble )	Enčiuflia nubausk ją ( du kartus ). Pliaukšt per ranką ir per užpakalį :)
Enchufla doble	Enčiuflia doble	Įjunk ją (dvigubas)
Enchufla con mambo	Enčiuflia kon mambo	Enčiuflia su "mambo kick" žingsneliu ir dile que no
Cero	Zero	0. Apeiname dešinėj esančią merginą ir grįžtam pas savo.
Ocho	Očio	8. Aštuoniuke apeinam dvi merginas iš dešinės ir grįžtam pas savo
Ocho con castigala	Ocho kon kastigala	8 su nubaudimu
Adios	Adjos	Atsisveikinimas
Adios con la prima	Adjos kom lia prima	Atsisveikinimas su sesere
Familia	Familija	Šeimynėlė. Pradžia, kaip adios com la prima
Cheque el material	Ček el material	Patikrink medžiagą
Ni pa'ti ni pa'mi	Ni pa ti ni pa mi	Nei tau, nei man
Silla	Sija	Kėdė
Una foto	foto	Kaip foto sustink
Una arriba	una ariba	Dame una ir einam pas kairėje esančią merginą
Enchufla arriba	enčiuflia ariba	Enchufla, po to pas merginą kairėje.
Adios arriba	Adjos ariba	Adios, po to pas mergina kairėje.
Foto Lituano	Foto Lituano	Lietuviškas foto
Vacilala	Vasilala	Išsuk ją
Vacilala los dos	Vasilala lios dos	Išsuk ją ir sukis pats :) (dvigubas)
Sombrero	Sombrero	Meksikietiška skrybėlė
Abrazo Lituano	Abraso	Apsikabinimas lietuviškas
Un beso	Un beso	1 bučkis (Kitam / -ai)
Dos besos	Dos besos	2 bučkiai savam / -ai su enchufla
Tres besos	Tres besos	3 bučkiai ( 1 kitam / -ai ir 2 savam / -ai su enchufla )
Paseala	Pasealia	Pavedžiok ją + enchufla
Caminala	Kaminala	Pasivaikščiojimas su dama + enchufla
Candado	Kandado	Spyna
Habana	Havana	Candado + Exhibela + Setenta figuros pabaiga
Setenta	Setenta	70
Mosquito	Moskito	Uodas
Canguro	Kanguro	Kengūra
Re-union		Enchufla ir vyru susikabinimas rato centre
Carrusel	Karusel	Karuselė
Play uno / dos / tres		Enchufla suplojant 1, 2, 3 kartus

Sunrise/Sunset

2011-09-28T11:08:00.000-07:00

Too often people miss the beautiful miracle of a sunrise or sunset. Schedule time to get up early one morning with a thermos of hot coffee or cappuccino and find a quiet place where the two of you can go just to watch the sun rise or set. Appreciate what nature has to offer and share it with each other.

Explorations

Find something you are both interested in exploring and do it together. For example, if you live in a place where there are caves, make a day of driving around and exploring caves. Be sure to take the right equipment and safety precautions but this puts you both in a position of trusting each other and discovering something new and exciting together.

An Attitude of Gratitude

2011-09-02T17:22:00.000-07:00

It is extraordinarily difficult to be grateful for much while in active addiction. Our worlds shrink, our lives don’t make much sense, all our problems are everybody else’s fault, and nothing goes as we plan. We are constantly met with disappointment, and develop innumerable resentments as a result of our fear, anger, and sadness.

Then we come into recovery, expecting everything to change. People will start doing what we want them to do, our plans and schemes will come to fruition the way we plan for them to, and our lives will suddenly be lived in Technicolor. We expect an easy ride and to be effortlessly happy, joyous and free.

With a little time in recovery, we realize that sobriety is not at all what we expected and, just as it was before, we are ultimately powerless over people, places and things. To add insult to injury, our fear, anger, and sadness is more acute than ever—how are we ever going to cope with life on life’s terms?

It is easy to concentrate our attention and energy on the things that disturb us, that anger us, and what we lack. After all, we had become so comfortable with negativity in our addiction. But when we start to look at the positives, the things that make us happy, and the things we do have, we start to recognize that our positives far outweigh our negatives.

There is much to be grateful for in sobriety. We have gained clarity of thought, have been restored to health, and reintegrate into productive society. We have made new friends, formed a strong foundation of support in AA fellowships and have learned coping skills we used to lack. Life possibilities are endless when we adopt an attitude of gratitude.

Found on http://www.thehillscenter.com/blog/recovery/an-attitude-of-gratitude/

Change routines

2011-07-29T08:20:00.000-07:00

Understand that every once in a while, it is important to throw an exciting curve into your relationship. If you are in a routine for example of offering your mate a quick peck on the lips before you part ways for the day, try adding a soft, gentle kiss on the neck. You can be assured that throughout the day, that change in routine, is what will be on your mateŝs mind.

Dance

Finding a nice place where the two of you can enjoy a slow dance is a great way to spend time together, holding each other without saying a word. Keep in mind that to accomplish this, you can stay home and simply move some furniture out of the way, light some candles, and put on your favorite soft music and enjoy some quiet, romantic time together.

Make Eye Contact

2011-04-19T14:05:00.000-07:00

You may not think this is important, but think back to the first time you saw your now mate. More than likely, the first interaction was through eye contact. If you are having dinner during the holidays with a large group of family and friends, glance over to your mate and give them a seductive wink, or if your mate is giving a speech and you are there to offer support, attentively look at them, making directly eye contact and offer a warm reassuring smile. Eyes can say a lot!

Learn More about Your Mate

Either find a good questionnaire or create one that does not dig up the past, but focuses on discovering other qualities about each other. One happily married couple did this and the wife, who had been standing by her husband for more than 10 years, discovered that he used to be a competitive ice skater. She had no idea. Guess what they did on Saturday?

Follow Your Instincts

2011-03-13T23:59:00.001-07:00

When things are going in a wrong direction, often people will simply keep going in the same direction while hoping that things work themselves out. The result is usually negative. Instead, listen to your gut feelings, your inner instincts. If you believe that something is bothering your mate or not right in your relationship, keep it between you and your mate and work things out as a couple.

Be Creative

The words, “I love you,” are always welcomed but why not add some creativity to the way you tell your mate you love them. Rent a billboard in a location where you know your mate drives every day that clearly says, “I love you,” request that your mateŝs radio station play a special song and message on his or her way to work, or if celebrating a special anniversary, have a skywriter fly by a ball stadium, park, or somewhere special where you are spending quality time together outdoors.

No Interference

2010-11-30T00:48:00.000-08:00

Do not allow other people to interfere with your relationship. If family members try to get in the middle of fights or debates, that is definite trouble. You might have friends with well-meant intentions trying to help you and your mate solve problems. Although getting another personŝs perspective is not a bad thing, make sure it is when you ask for it. It is very important to keep integrity in your relationship and not allow people to interfere.

Adore your Mate

Beyond telling your mate that you love them, that they are special, and having passion in your relationship, you should adore your mate and what they bring into the relationship. What that means is to appreciate and love them for the person they are, faults and all. This is true devotion to your mate and demonstration that you do not take them for granted.

Self Confidence Boosters That Work Within Five Minutes"

2010-11-10T14:23:00.000-08:00

In this short article you will learn about 'self confidence boosters' that work within five minutes, but first let's define just what 'Self Confidence' actually is. The online Cambridge Dictionary defines Self Confidence as, "behaving calmly because you have no doubts about your ability or knowledge." So it's clear from this that in some situations we can act in a self confident manner because we're familiar with it and have capabilities and knowledge.

It's the inevitable situations that arise on a regular basis with which we are not familiar, that trip us up thought
isn't it! New experiences which we have little knowledge about can cause us to doubt our capabilities. So what
exactly is this experience of 'doubting our capabilities' anyway?

All the feelings we ever experience from fear, doubt and confusion to inspiration and love are all derived from the pictures and self talk we continuously create in our 'mind stream.' These patterns of thought are often deeply ingrained habits and therefore function unconsciously out of our awareness, yet have a very powerful effect on our experience of life.

When we find ourselves in an un-resourceful state of mind such as self doubt, we are stuck in a thought pattern. A common one for self doubt would be internal self talk, ragging on you: "You're such a stupid so and so!" Or it could be that you're unconsciously seeing an image of yourself, in your minds-eye, when you made a mistake and felt really small back in childhood.

Here's an essential point though: It doesn't matter what or where this thought pattern came from. We're not interested in perverse Freudian 'personal history' archaeology are we?! No, what we want to learn is how to change our thought structures with simple self confidence boosters that we can do within five minutes, right?

So how can we re-program our habits of thought, overcome our
fears and doubts and increase our self confidence? Well for
starters what about counter examples. You can often come up
with a counter example. Think about a situation where you
lack self confidence. Now ask yourself, "Has there ever been
a time when I've felt more self confidence in a similar
situation?" Just allow yourself to access a memory of this.

Chances are you can find at least one counter example. This
leads us into a very powerful 'operating principle' in mind
programming: "All the resources are already within you." If
you act as if you have the resources you want such as 'self
confidence' very often you can find them within your memory
banks.

Now the other thing about the mind is that it goes in
directions. The fact is the future is full of possibilities.
It is pure potential. That means if we could program our
thought patterns we could create a, "I am learning to become
more self confident," 'unconscious-software-program,'
enabling us to head towards that desired outcome. This is
possible and one of the best ways to do so is through the
power of our 'self image.'

Your self image is simply how you picture yourself in your minds-eye. This happens regularly throughout the day, outside of your awareness. Try this: Remember an occasion when someone gave you a sincere compliment. You know, when you get the warm feeling at the heart. Now in your minds-eye notice what you look like at that instance. Simply picture yourself.

Utilising this 'self image mechanism' we can create a self
image which we are drawn towards enabling us to access more
resourcefulness, capabilities, potentials and possibilities.

Before I finish give this a go: Imagine a you in front of
you. This is a you from the future who has learned how to
become more self confident, more resourceful and has a great
sense of humour. How is that you standing? What is the
breathing like? How does the voice sound? Good, now step
into this new you and allow yourself to experience those
increasing feelings of confidence.

Now, can you imagine, what it would be like if you were to make this self image even more compelling? And what would it be like if you could program this state of being to automatically pop up in just the situations you want to be more self confident and resourceful?

(C) Colin G Smith 2010

Reap What You Sow

2010-11-09T04:12:00.000-08:00

This is an old saying that goes back a very long way but it still holds true today. If you sow love, forgiveness, faithfulness, encouragement, honesty, and acceptance, then that is what you will reap. It is definitely true that what you put into a relationship is what you get back.

Board Games

Pick a night, perhaps on a cold winter night, and just enjoy playing board games. This can be with just the two of you, or with several close friends. Bring out the snacks, beverages, and just have some fun. Laughter and fun are important factors in any relationship, for any age. Laugh and enjoy having a good time with good honest fun! You will truly be amazed at what this can do for your relationship.

Motivate Each Other

2010-10-14T03:08:00.000-07:00

Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you to being the best you can be. Find something that you can both be excited about and then attach some type of reward to the motivation. If one of you has had a dream of writing a screenplay, make that your goal and take that on together. The motivation is that when finished, the two of you will take a beautiful, romantic weekend vacation to some exotic place. The goal could be anything that is important to one person or both and that can be worked toward completion together. Another example would be if your mate has always dreamed of buying an old model car and restoring it do it together and then take a special trip to the Indy 500 as your reward. Yet another example might be to restore a home. Make this a joint project and then as a reward, add a Jacuzzi into your plans. Use your imagination and enjoy the venture together.

Embrace Change

There is no relationship on the face of the planet that goes for years and years without change. People change as they mature and view life differently, therefore reacting differently. Rather than get upset with each other over change, embrace change. You may not always like the changes that happen, but do not throw away a perfectly good relationship just because the trail starts to wind. Be patient and encourage new directions while being honest about concerns that might arise.

Adopt a Family

2010-09-21T05:55:00.000-07:00

When the Christmas holiday starts getting closer, locate a family together from your church or local charity services that needs to be adopted for Christmas. Together, shop for the gifts, and have the family over for the most scrumptious holiday dinner. You will both appreciate what you have even more as well as your own special relationship.

Getting Married

If your relationship has moved to a set wedding date and the countdown has started, do something unique and fun. Visit a candy store and have 30-miniature candy hearts made, each with a special message of love. Each day, present your mate with the appropriate candy heart. As you get down to the final days before the wedding, they might read something like, “Only two more days”, “Tomorrow: The Big Day”, “I love you, your wife (or husband).”

Host a Halloween Party

2010-08-04T02:01:00.000-07:00

Instead of just passing out candy for Halloween, organize a masquerade party together where everyone is required to come dressed up. Include in your party food, drinks, door prizes, and games. Have a few friends provide help you plan this and then go all out. Choose costumes the two of you can wear to enhance each other. A few suggestions would be to Adam and Eve (wearing skin-toned clothing – no nudity), Batman and Batgirl, Cleopatra and Marc Anthony, Romeo and Juliet, Robin Hood and Maid Marian, or Sonny and Cher. You will have a blast with the planning and searching out your costumes. This type of party is great for good laughs and fond memories of each other, which are important for a good relationship.

Special Music

Select numerous songs that your mate would enjoy and have them either recorded on a cassette or burned on a CD that can be enjoyed while driving to and from work. To add a little spice, record a few secret messages every few songs just reminding them how much you love and appreciate them.

New Adventures
Arrange for the two of you to try something new together. If you are both the athletic type, enter yourselves into some type of physical competition. If the two of you like the fine arts, audition for roles in a local community theater. Perhaps you like to travel. If so, arrange for a short trip to some place exotic that you have never been before.

Photo Album

2010-07-12T16:36:00.000-07:00

As a wonderful keepsake, create a photo album for your mate. Include the parents or siblings to come up with some special childhood and teenage pictures. Include family, friends, special occasions, and times of the two of you together. Whenever the two of you feel as though you are drifting apart or taking one another for granted, pull out the photo album as a reminder of the incredible person in your life.

The Art of Gift Giving

Everyone loves to be given a gift, especially as a surprise or “just because.” Just remember while giving gifts is a beautiful thing to do for the person you love, there are five key essentials for making your mate know that you are giving just because you love them. First, put some thought into the gift. Do not just pick up something at the last minute so you are not empty handed. Second, make the effort. Even if you have a busy schedule, be sure to schedule time to shop. Third, give with the right attitude. You give because you appreciate and love, not because you want something back. Fourth, plan what you are going to give. Find something that is important for your mate and not necessarily to you. Finally, add the element of surprise into the gift giving. Using this equation is sure to impress your mate and leave a lasting impression.

Family History

Perform some extensive research on your mateŝs family history, which will involve some help from the family, and create a website especially for your mateŝs family where they can share information, pictures, family recipes, and more! This will take some time and planning but very little money.
Myfamily.com is a great site that is extremely reasonable. This will not only touch your mateŝs heart, but the hearts of the entire family.

Tennis champion without fingers

2010-06-23T05:49:00.000-07:00

Roger Crawford is the first and only person in American history to be a United States Professional Tennis Association athlete and play a Division I college sport with a severe disability. Today, he is a public speaker, author, and is still a certified tennis professional. Several famous individuals and incorporations, such as Marriott Hotels, Nike, Chris Evert, and Ronald Reagan have acknowledged Crawford for overcoming handicaps. He was also featured in Chicken Soup for the Soul and in the NBC Emmy Award winning movie In a New Light.

Watch how man who first tied his shoes himself at the age of 16 became a famous motivational speaker.

Coupon Book

2010-06-18T03:08:00.000-07:00

Create a coupon book filled with any number you like of 20-minute massages. One day when least expected, when your mate comes dragging in the door tired after a long, hard day at work, present this along with a gentle kiss. Although you are the one offering the massages, if you remain faithful to your coupons and never grumble, your love life will more than likely be enhanced and before long, your mate will be the one giving you massages.

Dinner by the Fire

Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles, and lay out a cozy blanket in front of a roaring fire. Enjoy feeding each other food, sneaking little kisses in between. This wonderful romantic moment will help build your relationship even stronger. This kind of gesture shows your mate that you really want something special from your relationship and that spending quality time together is a priority.

Scavenger Hunt

If things have been a little stressed in your relationship, do something extra special. Start by creating a trail of rose petals from the door to the kitchen where your mate will find a note to go to the bedroom. In the bedroom, have another note next to an overnight bag telling them to meet you at a specific hotel restaurant where you know the ambience is cozy and romantic. The note should direct them to ask for you at the restaurant where you will be waiting to enjoy a fine dinner together. After dinner and cocktails, gently lead your mate by the hand to a beautiful room that you have reserved for the night. There on the bed is a robe and a red rose. This will do more for your relationship than you can imagine.

Life spirit by Chief Tecumseh

2010-06-08T05:20:00.000-07:00

So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart.
Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and
Demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life,
Beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and
Its purpose in the service of your people.

Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide.
Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend,
Even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and
Bow to none. When you arise in the morning, give thanks for the food and
For the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks,
The fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and nothing,
For abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.

When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts
Are filled with fear of death, so that when their time comes
They weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again
In a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home."

Take Pride in Yourself

2010-05-16T06:10:00.000-07:00

Every relationship goes through down time. Just because the flame has become a mild flicker, that does not mean you have lost the love for each other, it just means you need to add a little fuel to the fire. When couples have been together for a long time, the makeup comes off, the nice clothes turn into oversized sweats and tee shirts, and instead of cuddling on the sofa or floor, one sits on the couch and the other in the recliner. Step back in time and start getting dressed up more on the weekends, invite your mate to sit with you on the couch, dance together in your living room to some music, or take a walk, hand in hand. It is important not to let yourself go, even when your relationship reaches a “comfortable” state. By taking pride in yourself means that you take pride in your relationship.

No Jealousy Allowed

To have a healthy relationship, caring and concern are fine but when those emotions change into jealousy, this could be the beginning of trouble. Trust is probably the number one element needed in order to have a strong relationship. Without trust, things will quickly deteriorate. If one of you masters something special, receives a promotion at work, or achieves some great feat, there could be a small spark of jealousy on the other personŝs side. You need to talk about this and ensure that any feelings of inadequacies are permanently put to rest. Every person needs assurance at some time or another and as long as you can communicate, things will be fine. However, if your mate becomes withdrawn or irritated, these could be signs that more is going on. Once jealousy enters a relationship, problems are soon to follow.

Keep in Touch

If you are in a relationship, where your mate serves in the armed forces and is overseas or in another state on duty, away in a foreign country for school, or separated from you for one reason or another, it is important that you keep in touch with each other often. There will be stress from the separation but by keeping in touch and informing each other of the things each person is dealing with, how they feel, etc., you will not have any break in your communication. The goal is that when you get back together, you can easily pick up where you left off. This is a very important time to provide each other with confirmation of your love and validation of your relationship. While this will require some extra effort on both parts, keep in mind that the separation is not forever.

Good luck, Mr. Gorsky

2010-05-15T15:34:00.000-07:00

When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous "one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind" statement but followed it by several remarks, usual com traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Just before he re-entered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky."

Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years many people questioned Armstrong as to what the "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky" statement meant, but Armstrong always just smiled.

On July 5, 1995 (in Tampa Bay, FL) while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded. Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.

When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard. His friend hit a fly ball which landed in the front of his neighbor's bedroom windows. His neighbors were Mr. & Mrs. Gorsky.

As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky, "Oral sex! You want oral sex?! You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

True story.

Source : http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/blgorsky.htm

Day at the Movies

2010-05-09T04:19:00.000-07:00

Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday. Put all your errands and chores on hold and head to your nearest theater. Hit three or four movies and mix it up. Buy the theater popcorn and drinks but sneak your own candy in. This is a great way to spend some fun time together, holding hands or cuddling, while sharing some laughs and maybe tears watching a variety of flicks.

A Walk in the Park

Spending quality time together where you can talk and just enjoy each otherŝs company is critical to a good relationship. Plan a nice walk in the park to include a comfortable blanket to sit on the grass with while having a good old-fashioned picnic. Take this time talk, watch other people with their kids, and then just walk around, hand-in-hand.

Name a Star

As a special gift, ask your mate to join you outside at night when the sky is black and the stars shining brightly. Point up to the universe and state, “See that star over there? That is your star. I bought it for you.” Then present them with the certificate showing that they do in fact have a star named after them. This wonderful gift will last a lifetime!

Something Handmade

2010-05-02T22:11:00.000-07:00

You do not have to be a world-renowned artist to make something homemade and special for the love of your life. Even making a special, personalized greeting card would be appreciated and show your mate that you care enough to take the time needed to make something by hand.

Favorite Meal

If your mate has a meal, that is by far the favorite above everything else, go all out and prepare everything to order. Before they arrive home, put on something nice and a little sexy, light some candles, and have a wonderful surprise waiting.

Trip to the Pound

If you and your mate love animals, take a trip to the local animal shelter and pick out a dog or cat that needs a good home. Adopting an animal that needs a home can be a wonderful way to have something that you both can care for and love together. This will open up for long walks, taking your new dog on a walk, or hours of playing with a sweet and funny cat.

Strong Family Ties

2010-04-19T22:23:00.000-07:00

When in a relationship, not only are you involved with the love of your life, but also the family of your mate. It is important to build a strong, healthy relationship with the families as well. Even if you do not see them often, having a good connection with your mateŝs family will make life for everyone much better all the way around.

Mentoring

If you know of another couple from work or your church that has been married for many years and continued to have a strong relationship, ask them if they would mentor you. Being around positive influences and watching someone who leads by example is a great way to learn how to have a good relationship for yourself.

12-Month Calendar

As a special gift, have a 12-month calendar created with pictures of special times spent between the two of you. Arrange the pictures to coordinate with the months and then as a Christmas or birthday gift, or just as a special surprise, present it to your loved one.

Financial Woes

2010-03-30T22:10:00.000-07:00

One of the main reasons other than fidelity that marriages fall apart is due to finances. When couples are struggling with money problems, tempers flare, frustration builds, drinking may start, and it is an all-around unhealthy situation. The minute there are any signs of financial difficulties, the two of you need to immediately sit down and figure out a plan on how to deal with the problem. If needed, go to see a financial consultant or a credit counseling service to help you get back on track. Do not allow your finances to get out of line or your relationship will certainly suffer.

Forgive You

If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through. When your mate has done something that requires you to forgive, you have to forgive, REALLY forgive. Once you have worked through the issue either together or with professional counseling, and you tell them that you forgive them, you can never hold that over them again. As an example, if your mate has had an affair and the two of you choose to work it out rather than throw the relationship away, once the problems are resolved and the forgiveness is said, it is done! This means that you cannot stalk your mate to ensure they are where they said they would be, call or page them throughout the day, constantly ask for reaffirmation of your relationship, it means that you forgive and put the past behind you and then move on in a new, strong, and healthy relationship. It will not be easy, but you can do it with the right help, attitude, and commitment.

Fighting No-No

While having disagreements is normal and sometimes when controlled, healthy for relationships, the place and degree of discussion are important. Keep your disagreements private. Being at a party or anywhere around family or friends and breaking into an argument is a great way to break down a relationship. Not only does it cause embarrassment for your mate, but it also puts a negative light on both of you from the people witnessing the fight. If you are in public and think you need to argue, at least find a quiet corner or separate room where you can discuss whatever it is bothering you.

Turn the Computer Off

2010-03-30T00:11:00.000-07:00

Often the computer becomes a replacement for a lack of something in the relationship. It might be just surfing, playing games, or getting involved with websites that promote pornography. If you notice that your mate is spending more and more time on the computer, take this as a sign that even if not doing anything wrong, they are choosing to spend the time with the computer instead of you. In other words, use this as a sign that something is missing in your relationship. Start by talking and searching to confirm what it is bothering your mate and then work on making it better!

Follow Tradition

Keep some tradition in your marriage, which relates to the vows you took and the fact that marriage is sacred. Treat each anniversary as a celebration of your love and the time spent together. Follow the traditional anniversary gifts and see how creative you can be. The first year anniversary gift is paper. One husband bought his wife a beautiful Chinese drawing on rice paper, signed by the artist, and had it framed for her. Make this fun, exciting, and keep traditions alive.

Control Your Anger

Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments. For the sake of your relationship and the love you have for your mate, keep your anger in check. First, when people are angry, hurtful words fly, usually not even meant. However, after spoken, it is too late to take them back – the damage is done. Another problem with anger is that the word "divorce” can easily be thrown around. You may not mean it, but you know it hurts, thus making you the winner of the argument. NEVER talk about divorce in your relationship, even if just teasing. If you need to go to another room to cool off, and then do that, but whatever you do, do not allow your anger to take control of your relationship.

Making Love

2010-03-28T09:59:00.000-07:00

Intimacy is a huge part of a successful relationship. Choose a book from the bookstore and try to bring a little excitement into your relationship. Do not be afraid to experiment and learn new and exciting ways to please each other. Keeping intimacy alive is healthy and not a bad thing whatsoever!

Keep the Kids Out of It

Whether married or dating, if there are kids involved, it is crucial that they are not used as pawns in any situation. For example, if your mate wants to get intimate and you are not in the mood, do not say, “I need to help the kids with their homework,” or if something that needed to be done was not taken care of because you forgot, do not blame it on the kids by saying, “I was taking care of the kids and did not have time.” In the first scenario, be honest with your mate and tell them that you are very tired and while intimacy is important, you would prefer to make sure the kids are in bed on time so the two of you can have some quality time together. This opens an honest line of communication and does not place ill feelings on the kids, especially since it is not their problem to begin with.

Listen to How You Talk

When working on your relationship, more than likely you and your mate have settled into a pattern of speaking to each other. It might be with short, blunt answers, heavy sighs as though bothered, or with negative remarks. Pay attention to not only your words spoken, but also the tone in which they are spoken. Be positive, cheery, and respond in a way that will confirm to your mate that you are listening and truly interested – that you have time to listen and communicate. In addition, add terms of endearment into your conversation. Instead of “Good morning,” try, “Hi honey, good morning!”

Go on a Date

2010-03-12T03:31:00.000-08:00

Especially for married couples, but even for some “dating” couples, start dating. Often people become very comfortable in their relationship and sitting around on the weekends, watching movies is about as exciting as it gets. Ask your mate out. For example, actually call them and ask, “If you do not have any plans for Saturday night, would you like to go to a concert with me?” It is crucial to relationships that they keep the fire alive by enjoying the act of dating. There are many people in long-term, successful marriages that will tell you they go out on dates every week, which has been a huge bonus for their relationship.

Memory Box

Start a memory box to store old movie tickets, brochures from cities visited, concert ticket stubs, old ski lift passes, cards attached to flowers received, old love notes or letters, birthday cards or anniversary cards from your mate, anything that the two of you did together. Every once in awhile, pull the box out and look at the items with your mate. Reminisce about each memento, and keep all the special times in your life close to your heart!

Leave the Baggage Behind

2010-03-06T10:46:00.000-08:00

Every person on the face of the Earth has some kind of history, or “baggage”, although at varying levels. Do not walk into a relationship with your arms loaded with that baggage. The past is the past. Even though there are things from the past that are hurtful, and even damaging, learn from those things and come out a better and stronger person. This allows you to step into a new relationship with better knowledge of what not to do. Leave the baggage from the past alone, focus on today, and look forward to tomorrow.

Do Not Repeat, Do Not Repeat, Do Not Repeat

Learn from your mistakes. When something goes wrong and the two of you work through it, do not repeat the same mistake. Rather than dive right back into whatever it was you did or said, think before you act. At first, this will take some discipline but as you see positive results in the relationship, be encouraged that it is working.

Maintain Your Healt

2010-03-03T22:27:00.000-08:00

You might think – what does good health have to do with a good relationship? In reality, it has a lot to do with it. Having a good relationship means having the energy to enjoy getting out and doing things together. To do that, it is important to eat right. When people are tired, they become short-tempered and frustrated. For this reason, it is important to get the right amount of sleep. Good exercise keeps your body in shape for being adventurous together. Taking care of your body and mind will flow over into your relationship and make you a calmer, stronger, and better-balanced person.

Compliment – A Lot

Be generous with compliments. It is very common for people to notice something nice about another person and think about it internally, but never voice it. When in a relationship, compliments are like glue. They hold the coupleŝs attention and respect. Make sure your compliments are genuine and based on something you see or hear your mate do. If you have a clogged garbage disposal and your boyfriend or husband is able to unclog it, compliment them on being handy. If your girlfriend or wife takes her mother to the doctor, compliment her on her generosity. The fact is that criticism is destructive and can very quickly tear a relationship apart. Just like the cliché, “If you do not have something nice to say, then do not say anything at all.” This is very true – take notice of the good things your mate does and make it known to them that you see and appreciate those things.

Realistic Expectations

No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect. Be careful about putting someone on a pedestal, especially in the early stages of your relationship. Make sure that the expectations you have for your mate and yourself are realistic. There are going to be differences in opinion, and probably some disagreements. Also, do not assume that your mate knows how you feel or what you think about something. When discussing something important to you, ensure that you both understand the same thing. The reality is that neither one of you is going to know exactly what the other one needs. As long as you do not expect them to read your mind and accept that this is a part of getting to know one another and communicating, you will be fine.

Split the Responsibility

2010-02-04T22:35:00.000-08:00

Whether dating or married, weekends are always full of errands and chores. If you find that on the weekend things are lopsided, help your mate out. For example, if there are kids involved and one has a soccer game while the other has a baseball game, at the same time, offer to take one of the kids and your mate take the other. Make this a special time by packing a special lunch or snacks. Perhaps one of you has company coming and the house needs to be cleaned, laundry done, and groceries purchased. Set aside something you need done and offer to pitch in to help. Simply say you want to help and ask which of the jobs you can take over. This gesture will show your mate that you really care by sacrificing your time.

Love Means Having to Say You Are Sorry

If you make a mistake by doing or saying something that is hurtful or damaging to the relationship, say that you are sorry. Many people struggle with these words, even when they know that what they did was wrong. It actually takes a strong person to apologize. Do not wait until you think you have the courage but say it immediately, and with sincerity. Too often when couples argue, there is a long period of silence, which actually makes the anger and tension worse. You need to let your mate know immediately that you made a mistake and ask for forgiveness.

Be Yourself

Do not be phony in your relationship, trying to be someone or something different as a way to please your mate. For a relationship to work, both people need to be themselves and react to things naturally. Just imagine if you are really kind of on the silly side, enjoying life to the fullest. Then you meet a wonderful person who is much more conservative than you are. Because you are attracted to them, you try to squelch your normal vibrant personality. You are miserable and eventually, the person is going to be exposed to the “real” you. You have to base any relationship on honesty or it will eventually fall apart.

Showing Love

2010-01-27T22:10:00.000-08:00

Although hearing the words, “I love you” is special and important, sometimes you wish you could tell your mate as well as hear from your mate those words, but in special and unique ways. Here are some ideas of how this can be accomplished:

Rent his favorite movie, even if it is something you do not like, and plan an evening alone where you can be with him as he enjoys his special treat.
When he gets out of the shower, hand him a warm, cozy towel just heated in the dryer.

When you make him pancakes, first pour the words, “I Love You” on the griddle and cook for a minute to brown. Then, pour more batter over the words to create a round pancake. The result will be a pancake displaying those three special words when you flip it over.

While he is out of town, wash his car and surprise him by picking him up in a clean, shiny car at the airport.
Take him out to lunch.
Have his favorite breakfast on the table along with the morning newspaper.

Instead of bugging him to go to the grocery store with you, let him stay home.

Display your favorite picture of the two of you on the refrigerator.

Buy him a subscription to his favorite magazine.

Listen – Really Listen

2010-01-25T22:23:00.000-08:00

Get into a habit of listening to what your mate is saying. Not the kind of listening that you do when you go out or sit at the dinner table, but a different kind of listening. Have you ever overheard your mate make a comment to a friend or family member about something they really want or want to do? Maybe you heard your boyfriend or husband tell a friend that they would love a certain tool. For no reason whatsoever, make a special effort to get that for him. You might have heard your girlfriend or wife mention a spa that they would love to try. Again, without any reason, surprise her. This shows that your mate is really paying attention to things important to you.

Be a Kid

Do not be a prude. There is absolutely no reason why couples at any age cannot get into tickling matches or wrestle on the floor. Do not allow your relationship to grow old and stale. Understand and accept that it is perfectly fine to be silly from time to time. If you have nothing special planned on a Friday night, rent a few games, order in Chinese, plug in the Play Station, and play games.

All Decked Out

Although most people do not get dressed formally to go out, as a special treat, find an upscale restaurant, the opera, or even a ball, where the man can wear a tuxedo and the woman an evening gown. If possible, rent a limousine and have a bottle of champagne chilling before you get in. You will both feel good about yourselves and spending this magical evening together. This is something unique that brings another unexpected twist into the relationship, which keeps things interesting and alive. The two of you will have a romantic night that you will never forget.

That Kiss

2010-01-19T22:41:00.000-08:00

As couples become comfortable with each other, kisses can become lame. Get rid of the pecks and get serious with the kisses. The next time the two of you greet each other, enjoy your kiss and do not be so quick to stop. While there are appropriate times for serious kissing, they should be loving, sincere, and passionate, regardless of how long they last. You will find that as you pay attention to your kissing and let your mate know that you enjoy kissing them, you will both feel better about your relationship.

Be Kind to One Another

Unbelievably, kindness is often over simplified. Even good relationships can lack acts of kindness. This refers to “Do unto others…” Simple acts of kindness can have huge impacts on a relationship. If your husband or boyfriend is out working on the car on a hot summer day, make a thermos of ice-cold tea and take it to him, giving him a gentle kiss. If your wife or girlfriend has been working at the computer all day, walk up behind her and massage her shoulders and neck. You get the idea. Kindness means looking at the other personŝs situation and seeing what you can do or add to that situation to make it better or easier. This is a way to validate your respect for each other. Kindness will go a long way in a relationship.

Special Hobby

Find some type of hobby that you both enjoy and then do it together. It might be that you both love refurnishing furniture. Turn this into an adventure of going to estate sales together to find nice pieces of furniture and them refurbishing them as a team. Another option would be if you have both wanted to learn how to ballroom or salsa dance. Take lessons together so you can then go out on the town and dance the night away. This is a great way to make your relationship even stronger while adding in something fun that you both enjoy.

Make the Women Feel Good

2010-01-17T22:50:00.000-08:00

Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves. These recommendations might help:

Tell her how beautiful she is
Compliment her on her many skills (be specific)
Just once, leave the toilet seat down

Tell her how much she means to you
Let her know that she is your best friend
Show affectionate to her in front of family and friends
Let her know that you find her to be sexy

Make the Men Feel Good

2010-01-10T13:35:00.000-08:00

For the man in your life, here are some recommendations for making him feel special:

Flirt with him in public places
Just once, leave the toilet lidup
Lavish him with compliments
Tell him how sexy he is
Act jealous once in awhile, even if you are not
Remind him that he is a wonderful mate, husband, father, whichever applies
Tell him how handsome you find him

Say it with Words

2010-01-06T01:53:00.000-08:00

Surprise your mate with little notes found in unexpected places. If your mate travels for work, place a loving note somewhere in their suitcase. Perhaps they have a long commute to work. If so, slip a note saying, "I love you, in their CD case where you know they will find it. Another recommendation is sticking a note on the bathroom mirror so this will be the first thing seen in the morning. Be creative and have some fun with this.

Cuddle Time

When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence. However, as the relationship progresses or after children enter the picture, the cuddling stops. Take some time just to cuddle. If your mate is sitting on the couch watching a movie, or laying in bed reading, scoot close and tell them that you just want to cuddle. This makes both people feel secure and loved.

Breakfast in Bed

When was the last time you or your mate were served breakfast in bed? Never? On a Saturday or Sunday, when nothing special is planned, get up a little early and fix their favorite breakfast. Include the morning newspaper as an added bonus. Although they may be shocked, you can be guaranteed that this gesture of love will be appreciated.

Secret Getaway

2009-12-29T01:09:00.000-08:00

Plan a nice weekend getaway to some place off the beaten track where you can enjoy some privacy. A quaint cottage or charming bed and breakfast would be ideal choices. Scout out the area ahead of time and choose a few things that the two of you would like to do in the area but just be sure to leave plenty of time for you to enjoy some alone time. Order a nice bottle of wine or some hot cappuccino and relax in front of the fire! Make this a romantic weekend where you can rekindle your love.

Special Greeting

If your mate has to work late and you know he had a bad day, surprise him with a late-night gourmet meal. When you hear him arrive home, greet him in new, sexy lingerie, a warm kiss, and wonderful hot meal. After he picks himself up off the floor, he will fall in love with you all over again for this wonderful greeting. If reversed and the woman is coming home, after giving her a lingering kiss, have her join you in the dining room where the table is set with soft glowing candles and a wonderful meal. Have an envelope lying by her plate that when opened, she will read. This certificate is good for one thirty-minute massage after dinner.ā€¯ This is how you keep romance alive!

Just Because

Give your mate gifts just because. These do not have to be expensive whatsoever. For example, one woman had a miniature dish collection in her kitchen. Her husband came home and told her that he had a gift for her. Holding out her hand, he gently placed in her hand a miniature porcelain cup with her name neatly written in blue ink. She knew that this cup probably cost no more than $2.00 but the thought that he would take the time to find something she enjoyed, was worth $1 million. The small gifts packed with thought are far more cherished.

Happy Birthday

2009-12-21T13:52:00.000-08:00

As people grow older, in general, birthdays become less celebrated. Gifts are quickly given, meals eaten, and it is over. For your mateŝs next birthday, take some time to plan something very special. Make this a true celebration of their life as a way of showing your love and appreciation. Every person, even adults, like attention and love to be appreciated. Whether a surprise party or not, your mate will be impressed that you went to all the effort just for them.

Secret Getaway

Special Greeting

If your mate has to work late and you know he had a bad day, surprise him with a late-night gourmet meal. When you hear him arrive home, greet him in new, sexy lingerie, a warm kiss, and wonderful hot meal. After he picks himself up off the floor, he will fall in love with you all over again for this wonderful greeting. If reversed and the woman is coming home, after giving her a lingering kiss, have her join you in the dining room where the table is set with soft glowing candles and a wonderful meal. Have an envelope lying by her plate that when opened, she will read, This certificate is good for one thirty-minute massage after dinner. This is how you keep romance alive!

Be real

2009-12-18T02:14:00.000-08:00

No matter what industry you're in, build relationships. I'm referring to real, honest, longstanding relationships built on a foundation of
trust. Surround yourself with the very best in your industry.

No one can be the "best" at everything. No one can know everything. But with these relationships, you can pool your resources and keep yourselves informed in your own circle of power. Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, but someone else is there with their strengths to offset your weaknesses.

But be sure to build these relationships honestly and make absolutely sure that they're real. Otherwise, there will be no foundation at all if they aren't.

"John Alexander"

Special Holiday Message From Anthony Robbins and Sage

2009-12-16T22:34:00.000-08:00

Also, make sure to watch the short Jim Rohn video that Tony added to the end of his holiday video. We think you will find great value in this message.

We want to also give a special Thank You to Jim Rohn’s Organization for supplying us with this wonderful video.

Happy Holidays from all of us!

The Anthony Robbins Team

You can skip the happy Christmas wishes from Tony and go straigt to the Rohn video: If you change EVERYTHING will change.

Chinese peasant

2009-12-07T02:54:00.001-08:00

A man named Sei Weng owned a beautiful mare which was praised far and wide. One day this beautiful horse disappeared. The people of his village offered sympathy to Sei Weng for his great misfortune. Sei Weng said simply, "That's the way it is."
A few days later the lost mare returned, followed by a beautiful wild stallion. The village congratulated Sei Weng for his good fortune. He said, "That's the way it is."

Some time later, Sei Weng's only son, while riding the stallion, fell off and broke his leg. The village people once again expressed their sympathy at Sei Weng's misfortune. Sei Weng again said, "That's the way it is."

Soon thereafter, war broke out and all the young men of the village except Sei Weng's lame son were drafted and were killed in battle. The village people were amazed as Sei Weng's good luck. His son was the only young man left alive in the village. But Sei Weng kept his same attitude: despite all the turmoil, gains and losses, he gave the same reply, "That's the way it is"

I am leaving you till the next post with Richard Bach quote:

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly."

A Night of Passion

2009-12-04T14:29:00.000-08:00

Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy. Couples need to enjoy being together in an intimate way. When relationships are troubled, the last thing either person wants is to be sexual or passionate with each other. However, this is a part of the healing and rebuilding of the relationship and although it might be awkward in the beginning, it is crucial. Make your intimate time together special. Surprise your mate with a warm bubble bath, lighted candles, soft music, and a bottle of wine, or reserve a nice romantic evening at a local hotel to include a wonderful candlelit dinner, fine wine, and a beautiful room.

Dinner Party

Start a new tradition of hosting a dinner party every other month or two and inviting several of you and your mateŝs friends. Set up board games that everyone will enjoy, have some light and lively music playing, and plan to have a blast. Spending time with friends in this kind of setting is a great way to reduce stress. When stress is low, couples get along better. This is a wonderful way to interact with each otherŝs friends as a couple.

Lighten Up

2009-11-29T12:23:00.000-08:00

Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious. It could be that there is a tremendous amount of tension or perhaps they are not sure what to say. Regardless of the reason, learn to lighten up. Do not take every comment, glance, or movement as a serious problem. If your mate makes a mistake, which you both will, let it go, or if appropriate, laugh about it. If you make a mistake, do not be afraid to poke fun at yourself. This will automatically start the process of tension breaking.

Communicate

When couples are having problems in a relationship, communication is the first thing to stop. It is often easier to just be quiet than to get mad. When rebuilding relationships, just as communication was the first to stop, it now needs to be the first to start. This will require that both individuals let down their guard and pretty much throw caution to the wind. Healing in the relationship cannot start until you talk. Make an agreement that you will talk about anything and everything and that you will listen, really listen. That does not mean that you will agree with everything, which is perfectly fine. However, if you do not agree, do not yell, rather, the two of you need to calmly discuss the issue and together, work out a solution. This is hard work but within a very short time, you will both feel much better, individually and as a couple.

Re-establish Old Traditions

2009-11-25T14:51:00.000-08:00

If you and your mate had a tradition of some kind when you first got together, dust it off and breathe life back into it. Perhaps you met after work on Friday at the local pub for a drink, washed your cars together every Saturday morning, or attended church together on Sunday. Whatever it was, re-establish the tradition.

Predictability

If asking couples the factors involved in the demise of their relationship, one of the common responses is that everything in the relationship is so predictable. When rebuilding a relationship, do not be afraid of letting go of boredom. If you normally hate the fact that Saturday afternoons consist of your mate sitting for hours watching football, fix some finger sandwiches and something cool to drink and go join them on the couch, or if your mate spends hours in the garden trying to make things look perfect, surprise them with a new flowering plant, and then help to plant it. When taking a walk with your mate, stop and give them a soft kiss, say, I love you," and then keep walking. Take some chances and do the unexpected.

Re-establish Old Traditions

2009-11-23T14:53:00.000-08:00

Predictability

Needed Space

2009-11-21T10:21:00.000-08:00

As important as it is to spend quality time together, it is equally important to give each other time to do something they like. If your mate loves to fish but you have no desire to bait a hook with little, slimy worms, or if you like to go to the casino but your mate would rather do something different, encourage each >other to take time apart. Try establishing a set time for this very purpose, if possible. For example, perhaps you could determine that every other Friday night is "singles" night. This is not a time to date other people, but to enjoy preferred activities. Remember that you have to place trust in your relationship. If you try this and then drill them, to see what they did, whom they were with, and where they went, then the exercise has failed.

No Debates

If you know that you and your mate have proven differences in opinion on certain subjects, avoid those subjects. As an example, if you are a Republican and your mate is a Democrat, politics should probably be avoided. As the two of you identify new topics that could cause a debate session, stop the conversation before it even gets started.

Filler Talk

If you are married, especially with children, break out of the habit of talking about nothing. Many times, families will be sitting around the dinner table and the conversation consists of, Do you like your carrots? or I wonder what is on TV tonight? Instead, change your strategy to include real questions, showing real interest. Replace the normal, œDid you have a good day at work? with œTell me what you did at work today. Even if you do not understand everything being said, listen with interest. It is not that you are so much interested in the work, but your mateŝs life.

The Power of Touch

2009-11-02T04:59:00.000-08:00

When a child is ill, doctors will tell you that it is proven that a simple, loving touch of a parent can quickly pull the child through a crisis. It is the same for relationships. Playing with your mateŝs hair, rubbing their hand, a soft kiss on the neck, a soft pat on the leg or giving a gentle back rub will make a huge difference in how your mate responds to you. When was the last time you walked up to your mate for no reason and without saying a word, affectionately placed a kiss on their neck? This is not in a sexual way, but an affectionate way. There is a difference. The next time the two of you are sitting in the car, at the grocery story, or standing in line at the theater, quietly reach over and take their hand. Do not be surprised if you get a strange look of curiosity the first time!

Surprise

If you and your mate have scheduled some time for a Friday night dinner, put together a surprise instead. For example, if your mate loves professional wrestling, buy some tickets near the front or if they like concerts, purchase the tickets ahead of time, getting the best seats possible. When Friday night comes around, insist on driving and head toward the location where the event is taking place. When asked where you are going, simply answer, œI have a surprise for you. I know you love professional wrestling so I purchased two great seats for tonightŝs performance,¯ or œI know we had planned on going to dinner, but I wanted to surprise you with something special. I purchased tickets to see one of your favorite groups in concert. The idea of you getting the tickets for something THEY like and then keeping it as a special surprise will touch the heart!

Start Over

2009-09-28T11:13:00.001-07:00

When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting. They overlook the little annoying things the other person does. However, after time, the nagging starts, instead of hearing, œYou look beautiful,¯ they might hear œWhy are you wearing that shirt? If this sounds like your relationship, first, the two of you need to sit down and be honest that things have changed. Identify the things each other did in the beginning of the relationship that created the attraction in the first place. Then together, make a commitment to start over. The truth is, both of you will have to work on this. It will not automatically be easy but it is possible. Start by forgiving each other, forgetting the past, and then start over with the flirtation. Focus only on the special things your mate does and relearn to put the unimportant things aside. It will take some time so be patient.

Schedule Time

Spending quality time together is crucial. This time can be with friends, dining out, attending a sporting event, or cuddling together while watching a favorite movie. The activity is not what is important but the fact that you are together, doing something that you both enjoy. People have extremely busy schedules and between work, family, the home, errands, and everything else going on, finding time for your mate can be difficult. Just as you would schedule a meeting on your calendar, show some courtesy in the relationship by scheduling time with each other. Once the plan is in place, no backing out unless you have some life and death emergency.

Memory and Success: How to Create Success by Understanding Memory

2009-09-26T02:52:00.000-07:00

Remember that old familiar saying, "Out of sight, out of mind?" and the opposite saying, "Familiarity breeds contempt?" Well, in this modern world of online social networking and building a powerfully successful online business, it seems that the first saying holds the most relevance. So many people and businesses are vying for attention, clamoring to grab their piece of the money pie that is constantly being dangled by super online marketers.

On the web, in the social networking world, familiarity breeds income and often unimaginable success. Opportunities to participate in high paying joint ventures, affiliate marketing, speaking engagements, high priced consultation fees, expensive products and programs. The more familiar you become, the more likely you will be to receive lots of residual income, even when you are on vacation, enjolying time with your family and friends, participating in some leisure activity, or even sleeping.

One key to the success of the super marketers is that they have mastered the minds of others by knowing something about memory, about the way the mind works and the way people remember. Research has indicated that there are five basic keys to help you create such an onlne presence that people can't help but remember you. Apply these simple concepts and you may be amazed at the results in your business and in your life.

--The first event that happens is the most easily remembered. Be the first to present a concept, a type of product, an image, an emotion - or - present an old item in a new way.

--Repetition, repetition, repetition. Repeat your offer, your product, your advice, your solution - over and over and over again. Create blogs, articles, videos, more blogs, more videos. Send emails, enroll people in your free teleseminars, give free ebooks, free bonus reports, invite your prospects to an event, interview another well known entrepeneur, get interviewed on blogtalkradio, send more emails, create more articles, videos, blogs, etc., etc. etc. Put yourself out there on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, and hundreds of other sites. And don't stop keeping your material fresh and your presence alive online.

--Be unusual, unique, clever, different, even strange. Novelty, surprise and even shock bring attention. Grab people's attention. Make sure that you do not appear ordinary. Make sure you stand out. Create a cooky video, an eye catching logo, a shocking headline.

--Be personal. Treat all your online communications as if you are talking to a close, intimate, trusted friend. Share yourself authentically. Sound real, sensitive, knowledgeable and caring. Don't be afraid to show your insecurities or flaws. In fact, freely reveal your flaws so that people feel that you are like them and they think they can trust you.

--Send another announcement, email blast, link - TODAY. If you did it yesterday, great. But do it again today. People remember things that happened most recently. Be continually current. Put yourself in the news NOW

To build a successful business and then to maintain your success, follow the above simple rules of memory. Get people to know, like and trust you and then put yourself right in front of them in as many ways and as frequently as you can. And if you did it yesterday, do it again today.

http://sta.rtup.biz/profiles/blogs/memory-and-success-how-to

Face your Weaknesses

2009-09-11T10:41:00.000-07:00

The best way to get better at anything and to be successful is to face the weaknesses we all possess. Everyone has weaknesses and in order to be better, think clear, act appropriately, and succeed, you have to identify the areas you need to improve on and then take action to turn your weaknesses into strengths.

There is no better gratification than being successful. Accept that you are in for some hard work but the results will be incredible. Use these tips as guidelines and step outside the box. Take action and succeed!

Improve Efficiency

2009-08-31T13:55:00.000-07:00

You will want to develop your potential to its fullest. The more efficient you can become the better job you will do. Be efficient with your time by not procrastinating and efficient with your effort by staying focused.

Have Balance in your Life

Imagine yourself on a canoe with another person. The day is beautiful, sunny, and warm. The two of you are floating along without a care in the world. Suddenly, ripples of water start rocking the canoe and without proper balance, both of you, along with all your belongings, are thrown into the cold water. It is the same when you strive for success. You have to find balance not only for yourself but also for others around you. Balance means providing time away from work for pleasure, working extra hours when required, knowing when a new direction is required, etc.

Have Fun

When people start into the process of being successful, whether for personal growth or starting a business, they may start by incorporating fun, but within a very short time, they realize it is hard work and the fun simply falls by the wayside. If you look at some of the most successful people in the world such as Sam Walton, Oprah Winphrey, or Ross Perot, you will find common threads that run between all of them. First, they started with nothing; second, they are all multi-millionaires many times over, and third, they have fun. They enjoy life, the people around them, and even find enjoyment in the challenges. This one element is often forgotten. This is a crucial element for success and should be a part of your plan.

Be Nice

2009-08-30T08:42:00.000-07:00

Study after study has shown that people with pleasing personalities have an easier time reaching success. Now only are they more levelheaded in handling the business but they also draw people around them that are eager and willing to help. In fact, in addition to being pleasing, be polite, show true interest, and have a great sense of humor.

Guard your Emotions

Keeping emotions in check is not always an easy task. You will have times of disappointment that will require you to react with integrity. You may feel like crying and feel as though your world has just ended. Keep telling yourself that it has not ended and you will just have to make some adjustments in your plan. Never allow anger to be a response. You never know the trickle down effect of that anger and how it could permanently damage your reputation.

Break Bad Habits

Habits, regardless of size or nature, can be exceptionally difficult to break. This will take a lot of effort but you can do it. Unfortunately, poor habits can be the one aspect of your behavior that could be the obstacle to your success. If you have a habit of sniffling or chewing your nails when you get nervous or saying demeaning or offensive things as a way of trying to control, to be successful, whether on a personal or business level, you have to stop.

Timing is Everything

2009-08-23T12:09:00.000-07:00

You have probably heard it before “ timing is everything. Especially when it comes to opening a business, there is a right and a wrong time to start a business. This would be extremely important if your business has cycles or is seasonal. For example, if you are starting a business to do landscaping, the winter months when snow is on the ground is not the right time. You can be working toward your Business Plan, marketing ideas, finding investors, if required, etc., during those cold months, but you certainly would not want to open your doors for the first time in the heart of winter.

Keep it Lean

Start-up businesses do not have room for œdead¯ weight. As an example, when first starting out, if you need some assistance, rather then hiring a permanent employee that will involve salary, insurance, other benefits, etc., consider a temporary employee until the business grows. Keep improving the bottom line before you start adding on more expenses to your business.

Get the Word Out

If your success is focused on a business, when you get ready to open your doors, make sure you get the message out. This will include marketing promotions, advertising, sending out a press release, etc. The more people know about your business, the better chance of you have of reaching success.

Plan your Costs

2009-08-15T12:38:00.000-07:00

Unbelievably, there are thousands of entrepreneurs that start a business without the foggiest idea of what their costs are going to be. Either there is an estimation that is way overstated or understated. From the very beginning, you need to have a strong handle on knowing what you will need to get your business started and keep it running. Additionally, you need to have projections for your future success. Know your numbers and make sure they are accurate.

Believe

Not only do you need to believe in the product or service you are building to success, you also need to believe in you. Your confidence is what will get you through the difficult challenges and build credibility with your customers.

Know your Customers

You should know, really know, your customers, especially your top ten. Find out what they like and dislike. What other products or services would be of value to them? These very relationships are what will keep your business going. It is crucial to consider your customerŝs desires all of the time.

Economic Value

2009-08-09T14:31:00.000-07:00

Economic value defines your income. Considering your talent, also look at things that can help create economic value. These types of goals have better chance of being successful and lasting. Is there something in your community that could bring about more revenue? As an example, do you live in a smaller town where there are no fast food restaurants, causing people to drive miles outside of your town for a cheeseburger and shake? If so, perhaps opening a small fast food restaurant would be a great option. You could have the success of running your own business while bringing something to your community.

Want Versus Need

When you strive for success, do it because you want it, not because you need it. When you want something, it brings about intention, desire, and action. However, when you need something, it will lead to pain, stress, and frustration.

Be Independent

Do not be afraid to go for what you know is the right thing for you. Being independent allows you to take control over your destiny and emotional state. Stand firm in what you believe and do not allow other people to determine how you feel or what you believe in.

I have missed more than 9000 shots

2009-08-06T12:43:00.000-07:00

Today I start with the thought I found on Nervingas Žydas blog.

I have missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot... and missed. And I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why... I succeed."

Michael Jordan

Loser is the one who stops after some failures, leaders are those who are not afraid to fail.

And the next though from series of success tips is:

Identify Procrastinations

If you have a problem with procrastination, make a list of the things you constantly put on hold. This will help you identify your poor patterns and make the appropriate adjustments. Local colleges often have improvement courses regarding making better decisions and procrastination. Locate a class that would help you with this kind of challenge.

How to overcome self pity while increasing your love & compassion

2009-08-05T14:19:00.000-07:00

Imagine what life would be like if you learned how to utilise your self-pitying states of mind by transforming them into powerful resources instead.

Could this be possible?

So called negative states of mind such as loneliness, frustration and despair are neutralised, changed or eliminated with many of the current psychological models.

While these methods can get useful results the whole picture becomes more interesting when we consider what many spiritual traditions have often claimed:

Our suffering actually contains within it an incredible opportunity for growth!

The fact that we are deeply familiar with states of suffering enables us to generate the most noble of virtuous minds such as love and compassion.

What this implies is that with the correct know-how we can replace our habitual patterns of self-pity with minds of love and compassion.

The secret of this approach is actually really simple, yet incredibly profound.

To experience a feeling of love/compassion rather than retched self-pity we simply switch the object of cherishing.

With self-pity we are obsessively cherishing our self: eg) "Poor me, me, me, I'm so lonely" etc.

If we were to switch the object of cherishing to another person we have affection for, and who probably experiences similar and worse feelings, it would enable us to generate a feeling of compassion.

A much more positive state of mind!

Below then is a complete strategy for 're-programming' our thought patterns.

A Strategy for Overcoming Self-pity

1. When you're feeling sorry for yourself what does that feel like? Notice the negative feelings in your body.

2. As you experience those feelings what would you name them? eg) loneliness, frustration, worthlessness

It's ok if you have no name for the feelings.

3. Imagine seeing yourself over there. Simply observe that you suffering and allow a feeling of love and compassion to arise.

Be gentle with yourself. Remember in essence we are pure, virtually limitless, potential and the delusions and problems we experience are like waves on an ocean. They are impermanent. They cannot not change!

3. Now think of loved ones who probably experience similar feelings and worse. (It's important that you actually choose people you have an emotional connection with. Somebody you're close too and have affection for.)

4. As you picture them in front, with that image of yourself, notice the growing feeling of love & compassion arising...

5. Breath with this feeling for a minute or three. You may begin to notice how you soften. Enjoy the warmth and softening of your heart centre.

Build Bridges of Love & Compassion into the Future

To get this new strategy "wired-in" so it becomes an automatic habit we just need to do a few quick rehearsals in our mind.

So think of situations in the future where it's likely you would experience self-pity.

And notice what the first thing you would see or hear before the feelings of self-pity start up?

As you allow those feelings to arise go through the procedure from step 1.

Doing this rehearsal with a few situations, in different contexts, will enable your unconscious to generalise the new strategy.

What this means is that, in the future, as soon as feelings of self-pity begin to arise in whatever context, the new strategy will trigger and you will then have the freedom to
choose to experience feelings of love and compassion instead.

The choice is now in your hands.

Colin G Smith, nlptoolbox.com

Paint a Picture

2009-08-03T12:59:00.000-07:00

A great way to keep working toward your goal is to see it. If you want to open a computer store, find a picture or article about Bill Gates when he first got started. If your success is to lose weight, go to Diets.com or Slimfast.com and print off a before and after picture of someone that has a similar body type to yourself. Perhaps your goal is to redecorate your bedroom. Again, locate before and after pictures on the Internet of decorated rooms. Seeing is believing!

Develop Uniformity

At first, this may be a little challenging but strive to keep things on an even keel. This will keep your efforts and focus from going up and down. The more you can stay the course the quicker you will reach your goal to success.

Just Do It

Okay, so Nike coined that phrase but it is so accurate. Quit putting things off and just do it. If you want it bad enough, go for it!

Understand your Goal

2009-07-30T15:34:00.000-07:00

A great challenge is to prove to yourself that you can do it. One of the ways to prove this to you is to take on responsibility. If your goal for success involves opening a restaurant, work in a restaurant as a server to get a perspective of all the jobs involved to make the restaurant a success. Understand the entire business from the ground up.

Raise your Standards

You may think you are working your tail off and you probably are. Try raising the bar just a little bit. Always expect the best from yourself. Do not beat yourself up if you do not always hit 100% but increase your standards and strive for more.

Unconscious Power

The unconscious mind is a very powerful tool. Take advantage of this and each night before heading off to bed, take some time to pose questions to yourself and then allow your mind to hash them out while you sleep. In addition, mediate in whatever way you find relaxing before going to bed to clear your mind from clutter and allow the subconscious mind to go to work.

Be Logical

2009-07-25T05:40:00.000-07:00

Okay, you may be thinking that logic itself is logical. However, being logic in many cases means having some level of analytical ability. Regardless of the way you think, find the logic in it. This will help you think and plan clearly and honestly.

Give 100% Effort

If you are going to succeed, you have to be able to get through tough times. You will have to rise to challenges and not quit. You have to plan to go the extra mile and make personal sacrifices. Succeeding means giving 100% effort. Stay focused while keeping your performance on a consistent basis.

Take Classes

Take some classes at college where you can get a certification. Enhancing yourself on a personal level will boost everything about you, making you feel better, about the person you are. When you feel better, you achieve more. This is a great time to obtain your certification in CPR, First Aid, a computer class, or some other outside interest you have.

Offer a Guarantee

2009-07-23T06:36:00.000-07:00

If you have created a business that offers either products or services, in order to get and keep customers coming back, they have to know that you stand behind what you offer. Providing a guarantee will help your business grow and reach the highest level of success.

Get Excited

Do you remember your first trip to see a professional baseball game and how exciting it was to see the thousands of people cheering, enjoying the mouthwatering smell of popcorn and hot dogs, and hoping that you might get a chance to catch a foul ball? Perhaps you can remember your first prom, being excited that the right boy asked you to the dance, shopping for the perfect glamour dress, and buying your date a corsage. You need to be excited about your venture for success. Remember some of the things that brought true excitement to your heart when you were growing up and add that same excitement to your grownup life.

Expand your Mind

Whatever your idea of success, take it one-step further. Stretch your mind and reach just one-step higher than you thought you could reach. If you were going to open an ice cream store, offering 30 flavors, go one more step and make it 31. Okay, you get the idea.

Be a Strong Leader

Learn to be a good leader and a good mentor. Enjoy making a difference and in guiding others to achieve their potential as well. Help people reach to new horizons.

Learn How to Delegate

2009-07-21T07:59:00.000-07:00

As you start getting closer to your goal of success, you will find that there are many more things to do than hours in the day. If going into business, consider hiring someone; even part-time or on a freelance basis to help take some of your load. If your success is more on a personal basis, have family or friends pitch in to help you get things done. You will be amazed at how much this will help ease the situation and allow you the proper amount of time to focus on the things that need your full attention.

Be a Problem Solver

Rather than stew over things or let stress overtake you, find ways to become a problem solver. Look at ways that you might find new customers, increase productivity, or resolve issues.

Conduct Research

It is important to know what you are getting into. First, you will want to conduct research as far as the business, industry, or interest associated with your particular success. Second, the research will help you stay up to date on trends, which may or may not require you to make adjustments in your own goal. For example, if you were interested in opening a particular business focusing on a specific technology and that technology took a turn to another direction, new advancements, you may need to change the direction you were going for your own business. Unless you kept up on research, you would not know when a change was needed and therefore, would end up building a business already headed for failure.

Set Realistic Goals

2009-07-20T17:47:00.000-07:00

People wanting to be successful often want overnight results. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen. You need to do an analysis to determine a realistic amount of time it will take to reach your specific success. As you go through your Business Plan you may find times that dates have to adjusted but even if there are changes, keep it realistic. Otherwise, you will become frustrated and quit!

Talk About It

Talking about your goals for success not only keeps it in the front of your mind but also keeps up your excitement level. In addition, it adds in an element of accountability. Think about it, you go around telling everyone that you are going to be a masseuse, those people are going to be expecting, and anxious to see you succeed. By talking about your goals, you are creating a motivational system “ a system of accountability.

Don''t Make Quick Decisions

When things in your plan need to change, unless necessary, do not make quick decisions. Just as it took time to plan in the beginning, it will take time to change. You want to make sure you are making the right decisions when changes come up. Do your research just as you did in the beginning and then make educated choices.

Avoid Stress

When you strive to be successful, stress is a natural part of the process. Do everything you can to avoid stress. Adding in unnecessary stress into the equation will take focus away from accomplishing your goals. You can listen to relaxing tapes, get a professional massage, take a walk, or whatever helps you >to relax. When you start feeling overwhelmed, stop, change direction, and avoid stress. The only thing stress accomplishes is draining your think power and creativity.

Apply What You Learn

2009-07-17T04:28:00.000-07:00

Since you will be setting milestones as you reach for your success, apply what
you have learned through each phase of the process. Doing is a much more
powerful tool than simply reading or watching.

Study Time

No matter what your goal for success, you should set aside some time to study.
If you want to be a successful hair stylist, study different styles, colors, and
trends. If you want to be a veterinarian, study animals. Whatever your
success, take time to read, research, and ask many questions. You should also
consider volunteering at the local beauty school or hair salon or your
veterinarian’s office. Ask if you can follow them around for a day or two and
without getting in the way, observe, and ask questions.

Provide Yourself Time

You need to be sure to allow yourself some time just for pleasure. Being
successful is hard work so to avoid burnout; you need to treat yourself to a night out or just time to sit back, watch TV, and do absolutely nothing once in
awhile.

Take Notes

2009-07-16T08:52:00.000-07:00

How many times have you had an idea either through a dream, while doing the dishes, or sitting at your desk, and have thought that as soon as you have time, you will make a note of it. When that free time rolls around, you have forgotten some or all of that great idea. Keep a journal or notepad handy at all times. When you have an idea, write it down immediately.

Take care of Yourself

Being successful means taking care of you, both physically and emotionally. You will need to have energy, focus, and rest. In turn, this will help you concentrate and put in the hours required to be successful. Without taking proper care of yourself, you will end up struggling and your business could feel the effects.

Take Good Notes

Whether you are at a seminar, a casual meeting, or notice something special in the news, take good, comprehensive notes. This is not always a natural skill but something that has to be acquired. You want to pay attention to the emphasis being made capture it. Even if there are materials being handed out, >if there is something that you feel you should capture separately, do it. Good notes will help you learn better and provide additional reference points.

Participate

If attending seminars or lectures that will help you get ahead, if there is the opportunity, participate by asking questions or making valid points. Participation is a great way to remember what is being taught.

Be Serious

Take your efforts to success seriously. Success is a serious thing and it takes serious dedication. You have to have the mindset that this is not going to be all play, at least not in the beginning.

Location, Location, Location

2009-07-15T15:40:00.000-07:00

If you are planning to open a business, you have probably already heard how important the right location is in order to be successful. Do not settle for any location as a means of getting the doors of your business open. Instead, take the appropriate amount of time and find the right location. This will be one of the best decisions you can make. It would be far better to delay your opening a month in order to secure the right location than to open early in the wrong location!

Good Habits

Being successful, whether personal or business requires good habits. It is just like trying to do well in school. You have to have good study habits in order to do well on tests. It is the same for the business world. You need to do your homework. Read the newspaper, scout out opportunities, and take time each day to dedicate specifically to your endeavor.

Be Open to Improvement

Sometimes, people get into the habit of thinking they have the answers needed. You need to accept that you do not have all the answers and more importantly, be open to recommendations from other people. That does not mean you have to agree or even follow those suggestions, but it does mean to listen. You never know when someone will have an idea that will make things easier and more functional, ultimately helping you arrive at your goal more efficiently.

Get out of Debt

2009-07-14T07:25:00.000-07:00

Take time to get any debts paid off, especially credit card debts that will cost you a fortune in interest. This is especially important if you will be seeking funding as a part of your particular success. You want to ensure that your records and credit are clean if you need to make a presentation before an investor, asking for money.

Read about your dreams

Stay current on the industry news that your goal falls in. Learn about current trends, company failures or successes, new ideas; whatever information you can find. For example, if you have decided to open a retail store and have a great idea and a real passion for your goal, read about that specific type of store, location, potential revenue, downfalls, everything. This information will be a part of your business plan and is crucial.

Community involved with your community

Regardless of what your goal for success is, get involved with your community. First, get involved with town meetings, the local Chamber of Commerce, and attend community functions. You will be amazed at the opportunities for support, business ideas, and financing available right there in your own neighborhood.

Record Keeping

Always keep your records up to date. This would include contact information, investor information, Business Plans, attorney information, accounting, everything you touch regarding your goal. In addition, keep your files on your computer backed up and current. First, you never know when you are going to be asked for a specific document and need to provide quick turn-around.

Second, computers do crash and it would be a disaster if all of your information were suddenly gone.

Collaborate with Others

2009-07-13T12:03:00.000-07:00

More than likely, you will reach various times when you do not have the appropriate expertise to accomplish something. This is the time collaboration and/or networking is valuable. These relationships can help you answer questions, provide guidance, and provide the ongoing support and encouragement you will need.

Customer Relations

Keep your line of communication open with your customers. If they have a problem, show them the deserved respect and resolve the issue quickly. Make occasional phone calls to see if they have any needs. This will let your customers know that you are there for them and care about their business. This relationship is what is going to keep you on the road to success. After all, the customer is your link between failure and success.

Repositioning and Reflection

On occasion, reflect on what you have accomplished as well as your open milestones and ensure you are still heading in the right direction. Repositioning along the way to success is perfectly normal and to be expected. You may have been struggling with something specific. Rather than continue battling this issue, reflect on what has not been working, and reposition yourself so you do not have to keep battling the same things repeatedly.

Accept Responsibility

You and you alone are responsible for your success. While you will have help in many instances, the bottom line is that you are responsible. You need to be surrounded by the right people, working with the right investors, going about meeting your success in the right way. It is you that will make the choices and therefore, your responsibility to make the right choices. In other words, your desire for success must always be greater that any obstacle that stands in your way.

Make the Process and Adventure

2009-07-10T11:13:00.000-07:00

You should look at every angle of your journey as an exciting adventure. When you think of your childhood years, you loved investigating the unknown. Carry this with you as you strive toward success. Anticipate the excitement of each accomplishment ā€“ make it a real adventure.

Don't Neglect Things

Especially when things are small and do not appear to have a major impact on the big picture, you need to ensure you follow through and complete your tasks. Those little things can quickly add up to a big mess if not taken care of in a timely and efficient manner.

Offer Praise

If you have people helping you out, whether on a volunteer basis or a full-time employee, always offer praise. These people are an important part of your success and by providing praise and support; in return, they will show dedication and work hard to help you reach your goal.

Set Daily Goals

In order to visualize your accomplishments and stay encouraged, you need to set daily goals. These goals can be as simply as a follow up phone call or a written letter to an investor. Whatever the task is, get it done. In addition to keeping the process for your success on track, it will help you to feel like you are making accomplishments, pushing you closer and closer to the success.

Keep a Journal

2009-07-09T14:27:00.000-07:00

As you work hard to reach success, regardless of what you consider that success to be, you need to be able to see your accomplishments. Start a journal and track every thing you have conquered. When you feel discouraged or frustrated, reflect on what you have achieved, and rejuvenate yourself.

Rewards

When children do something great, parents will reward them with something nice, whether a kind word of encouragement or a new toy. When people do well in their job, they get raises. As you surpass your milestones, reward yourself. Treat yourself to something nice ā€“ a new dress, a new fishing pole, whatever you like, be sure to award yourself for a job well done.

Watch for Scams

Whether you are just starting out or expanding an existing business, unfortunately, there are thousands of people waiting to defraud you out of money. If something appears too good to be true “ IT IS! Always conduct thorough research and never jump into opportunities that look perfect. If someone becomes pushy, wanting you to make a quick decision on any type of investment, do not walk away “ RUN away!

Focus on the Big Picture

As you make your way toward success, you will be challenged with big obstacles as well as small obstacles. Pick your battles wisely. While you need to resolve the small issues, do not dwell on them and lose precious time and energy when you should be focusing on the bigger picture. In other words, do not allow the menial things to clutter your mind and monopolize your time. 139. Make the Best of Each Day

Try to live every day as though it were your last. Make the most of every day and accomplish something. Even if it is something small, every baby step adds up to a huge success in the end.

The Picture re-Frame

2009-07-06T14:19:00.000-07:00

1. Think of a situation where you want to change your feelings. You want to have more choice in how to respond.

2. Now picture that situation. What do you see?

3. If you haven't already, step outside of the picture and push the picture off over there so that you can see yourself in it.

4. Now look at that image and become aware of any new insights and understandings from this new perspective.

5. What would happen if you were to imagine placing a wooden frame around that picture?

6. Allow your unconscious or your imagination or your creative part or your 'other than conscious resources' to try out other frames.

What about a plastic frame. Try changing the colour of the frames. Put the picture in an oval frame.

What would a comedic frame look like? A Sexy frame? A frame of excellence? Or a learning frame?

And what would happen if you were to place a light on top of the picture frame. Would it literally 'shed new light on things'?

7. One more little experiment: Imagine, whilst looking at the picture, feeling the texture of the frame. What does the frame feel like? Now soften the frame. Try a Balsa wood frame. Or how about a silly putty frame!

Good Time / Resource Management

2009-07-06T05:57:00.000-07:00

Being successful also means keeping to a schedule. In addition, you need to learn how much is too much. Good time and resource management will help you ensure that you use your time wisely and that you are not adding third portions onto a plate still overflowing with seconds.

Make Opportunities

Rather than wait for opportunity to find you, you need to find opportunities. This might be watching for business opportunities in the paper regarding small businesses being sold, great real estate opportunities, and investments with stocks, bonds, or mutual funds, taking a talent and turning it into an entrepreneurial adventure. People that have reached financial status will tell you that they look for ways to seize opportunities, not wait for opportunities to come knocking on their door because it will not happen that way.

Attitude

Putting yourself in the right attitude for success should be at the top of your list. Staying positive and surrounding yourself with friends, that share a positive attitude will help you succeed. Do not allow negative thoughts to slip into your mind. Attend motivational seminars and find ways to enjoy life. A good attitude will allow you to turn any bad situation into a learning experience. You have heard the saying, “The glass is either half-full or half-empty.” You need to adopt the attitude that life is half-full. The result is that you will feel better, have more energy, and have a much higher opportunity for success.

Be Thankful

You need to be thankful for not only your accomplishments but also your failures. Having a grateful attitude is important. It will help you stay humble, which in turn, will help you continue striving for the ultimate in success.

Don’t Settle

2009-07-05T04:49:00.000-07:00

If you have a goal of becoming a world-famous chef and you know you have both desire and skill, do not just settle to become a short order cook at your local family-style restaurant. While that may be good training ground, do not allow yourself to lose sight of your ultimate goal.

No Excuses

Many famous actors, music artists, inventors, etc., had special challenges ranging from learning disabilities to physical disabilities. Take Beethoven for example. He was born deaf yet he went on to be one of the world’s greatest composers or Joni Erickson who was paralyzed from the neck down yet she learned to paint with her mouth. Today, her paintings are famous around the world and worth millions. If you are faced with a special challenge of your own, while you may have to adjust things from time to time, do not use excuses. If you want something bad enough, there is a way!

Getting Past Fear of Failure

Being afraid of failure is a normal emotion for every person on the planet. How you get past that fear is the determining factor between failing and succeeding. You can do that by setting realistic goals and then examining those goals on occasion to do any necessary realignment. Above all, believe in yourself and the desire burning within.

strong>Patience and Dues

Succeeding takes time. A goal worth setting will take time to achieve. Be patient with yourself, the people around you, and the process it takes to become successful, also referred to as “paying your dues.” Just like the chef scenario, it takes time to be a master chef. Pay your dues by learning and working your way up the ladder to success.

Be Proactive

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While it may take time to learn how to identify ways to avoid obstacles or failures, get into the habit of tackling problems before they arise. This will help you avoid wasting precious time on your road to success.

Stay Motivated

When striving for the big goal of success, it is critical to stay motivated. Find inspiring and motivational tapes, seminars, books, movies; whatever you are able to get your hands on. When you start to feel a little down and out and doubt starts to creep in, turn to these motivational tools to help you keep on track. A few excellent motivators include Tony Robbins, Norman Vincent Peale, Jim Rohn, Zig Ziglar, and Les Brown.

Give Yourself a Break

While being determined is important, do not be so hard on yourself that you become critical of every move you make. Give yourself some room to make mistakes and be flexible with you. That does not mean you can miss goals but it does mean that if you do, you find out how to avoid that from happening again and then get back to business.

Be Passionate

Fall in love with what your success. Okay, although that sounds funny, you need to have an intimate passion with your interest. You can do this regardless of what your success is. By having passion for what you are doing and driving toward, you will automatically put more effort into it. Passion is a good thing as long as it does not become an obsession.

Toxic Poisoning

2009-07-02T13:21:00.000-07:00

No, we are not talking about actual poison but toxic people that can poison. Unfortunately, it would be great if close friends or co-workers could share in your success but all too often, there will be someone who is either dealing with the green monsterā of jealousy or has a case of theI knew that syndrome. If you are serious about reaching your goal and being successful, you will need to rid your life of these people. While you may not be able to get them out of your life completely, you should avoid them as best as possible. If this is a person, you see every day, keep your goals to yourself, and avoid that specific subject.

Be a Good Listener

To succeed, you need to learn how to listen first. Pay attention to other people who have enjoyed successes in their life, attend seminars given by people that can motivate and encourage, or be open to hearing that a particular idea is not a good one. Good listening takes time to learn but in the end, it will be your greatest tool.

Birds of a Feather

If you have a goal of being a best-selling author, find friends and mentors who either have achieved that same goal or are also pursuing a successful writing career. It is important to surround yourself with people that can associate with your goal and passion, people who understand the burning desire to succeed and can encourage when you meet with disappointments.

Little Red Engine

Do you remember the story of the caboose that was desperately trying to make it over a very large hill? He kept telling himself repeatedly, œI think I can, I think I can. When you start feeling overwhelmed or defeated, tell yourself aloud these same words. While it may seem a little awkward at first, stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself, œI think I can, I think I can. You might even change the words to, œI know I can!

15. Have Courage

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Depending on what your specific success is, it may take courage to arrive at your desired destination. For example, if you have a dream of being a writer and to you, that is success, but according to your long line of family members who have all gone on to be doctors, the only success in their minds is if you follow down the medical path. This means you will have to have courage to stand up for what you believe and desire to do, even if it means disappointing family.

16. Be Excited to Learn

Referring back to the analogy of Edison, when asked about his failures by a young boy, Edison commented, “Young man, I didn’t fail 9,999 times, I discovered 9,999 ways not to invent the light bulb.” As you work toward your specific success, always enjoy opportunities to learn, even if it takes longer than you think it should.

17. Share your Success

Although this may be more at the end of the process, it is important. When you finally do reach your success, use your experience to teach, guide, and mentor others so that they too might succeed.

18. Seek Input

Whatever your idea of success, conduct a “sanity check” throughout the process of reaching your goal. This should be done with someone you trust and who is themselves successful. Ask them to provide honest feedback about your success and as you move through different milestones, bounce concerns or new ideas off them to help keep you on the right track.

10-12 tips for achieving success

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10. Have a Plan

Even if it is flimsy to begin with, you should construct a plan to include goal, milestones, deliverables such as contracts, business plans, etc., and accomplishments. This will provide you with a visual as to what you are working for, what milestones you have successfully met, and where you need to do better.

11. Accept Responsibility

You need to accept responsibility if you make a bad decision or fall behind in your plan. Let us say that you have set some firm milestones that need to be accomplished in order for you to move to the next step. However, you got tired of working hard and took some time to play, which is fine as long as it does not affect your goals. Now months have passed and you are way behind schedule. This delay has closed several doors of opportunities. Who is to blame?

12. Be Happy

A positive mind and happy, upbeat attitude will help you succeed. It has been proven in many studies that a person living in a happy state generally gets much further in just about everything they do. This relates to attitude. Just as bad attitude can pull you down, good attitude and a happy, healthy mind will help you meet your objectives.

7-9 tips for

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7. Stop the Complaining

You might think there is no correlation between complaining and success when in fact there is a connection. When you are spending time complaining about the obstacles you are facing, you are wasting so much time being negative that you are actually loosing chances to move forward. Instead of thinking of challenges as problems, think of them as opportunities.

8. Focus on Something you Like

To increase your chance of succeeding, you should concentrate your efforts on something you enjoy. When you start out, make a list of everything you find interesting. Then in a second column, write down the skills you have in relation to each of those items. This will help you narrow choices down based on interest and skill, which gets you started in the right direction for success.

9. Change your Circumstances

You have a choice in life to accept your position or change it. If you choose to plug along in life hoping that something will change for the better, you will not get very far. Always remember that when it comes to changing your circumstances, you can ā€“ you have that power. As an example, women who are in abusive situations often feel controlled and powerless to get out of the situation. They have the same choice of changing their circumstances as you do. If your circumstances lower the chances of success, you need to change them.

4-6 tips how to achieve success

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4. Business Plan

Create a Business Plan as your very first step if you are planning to build a business. Whether you will be searching for investors or not, this plan will be the blueprint to your success. The Business Plan will consist of market trends, financial planning, competitive analysis, exit strategies, marketing and promotional options, everything about your goal. When going before an investor, you will be required to have a Business Plan. This is by far the most important document of all. If your success were something personal, you would not need to create a Business Plan although a project plan would be a good option to allow you to keep track of everything involving your goal.

5. Don’t Give Up

To reach success, you have to persevere. Even Thomas Edison had to learn this. When he was creating the incandescent light bulb, it took him more than 10,000 times to get it right. Keep striving even when it becomes challenging.

6. Have an Unstoppable Attitude
You need to have determination. With good intentions, there may be a close friend or family member that feels it would be better if you focused your attention in

1-3 Ways To Create Huge Success In Life and Business

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1. Realize your Potential

In order to succeed at anything, you need to see that you have the potential to reach your goals. For example, if you want to be a recording artist but have no singing ability, having success in this field is not likely. However, if you love working on cars and have a real talent for fixing engines and transmissions, and to you, success would mean working for NASCAR, you have potential to learn and achieve that success.

2. Don’t Look Back.

Everyone has failures or mistakes from the past. To have success, you need to learn from your past and value those difficult lessons but do not every dwell on the past. Simply move forward and make better, more educated decisions from the lessons learned.

3. Dare to Dream

To succeed, you need to have dreams and aspirations. Be honest with yourself as to what you want out of life and what you want to give of your life. Allow your mind to dream and think big.

Why We Want You To Be Rich

2009-06-21T12:25:00.000-07:00

Did you know Network Marketing has produced phenomenal results?

Donald Tumpt and Robert Kiyosaki two multi millionaires and leaders of multi level marketings systems.

They are sharing with me all the reasons I would fail. I can do it anyway, found success and live a life most people only choose to dream about.

What's great about Network Marketing is that anyone can make as much money as they like...regardless of their business experience, financial situation or education! Network Marketing provides systems, leadership and the ability to work from home.

Network Marketing has provided an opportunity for average people like me to achieve extraordinary financial results and have total control in their life.

There are a lot of opinions about MLM and most of them are negative, you can choose if it is for you, but the fact is that leaders achieve here amazing riches.

You can listen to free audiobooks from these two leaders by registering on http://www.whywewantyoutoberich.com/ and learn a little bit more about.

First one is some rules from THINK BIG the book by Donald Trump

Another one from Kiyosaki where he is telling how he the average guy from Hawaii become millionaire and partner of even richer guy Donal Tump :

Does harder will guarantee success?

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A small housefly was burning up the last of its energy in an attempt
to fly through the glass of the windowpane.

It's clear what the fly's strategy is: try harder.
He's staked his life on reaching his goal through raw effort and
persistence. But, it's not enough.

The fly is doomed. He will die in this room....

....but that's not the tragic part.

Across the room is a door standing open; through it, you can clearly
see the outdoors. If the fly wanted to, he could change strategy and
be free in less than 10 seconds.

In fact, it would be EASIER than what he's doing. He could be free
with only a FRACTION of the effort. It would be so easy.

Why doesn't he try another approach? Something dramatically different?
Where did it get the idea that trying harder will guarantee success?

No doubt it makes sense to the fly.

But, it doesn't matter. His hard work and blind effort will be his death.
He'll be a small corpse in an hour or so. Someone will dust him off the
windowsill later today.

Hey, has it ever occurred to you how many people are just like that fly?

It never occurs to them that the actions they're taking will never make
them successful. They just keep doing the same thing over and over
without ever realizing that they're spinning their wheels.

And -- just like the fly -- the solution is SO simple...and it's actually
LESS work than what you're currently doing.

Hey, are you finally serious about making a better life
for yourself?

From the email of Tony Rush

Perfect way to mulf

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You trying to think positive, to dream, but at the end everything you are doing is getting back to the problems and focusing on the failures. Isn't that the straight way to becoming a pessimist?
How many people get up in the morning just because they need to go to the toilet?

The fact is: There is nothing more subjective, than a subjective reality.

So if you are dreaming do it with all the bright colors, loud and energetic music. Feel the same as you were feeling in the happiest moments of your life.

Author Toni Morrison who get a noble prize said: if you want to fly, you have first to throw all the shit which is pulling you down away.

Always work, do something. Ask what exactly are you doing and what are you trying to achieve?
Always ask why ? Do not be afraid to ask why I didn't succeed? Why I am not rich? Why I do not have the relationships I want?

Do you make excuses?

2009-06-03T01:56:00.000-07:00

Do you want to change something in your life?

Do you want more money?
More success?
More happiness?

If something in your life is not going as you want, you might be interested in this Tony Rush audio. This audio is to design to make you think!

All this stuff you might already knew before, but did you take the responsibility of your live? So if you suck today, that's the result of all the thing you did till today. If you are not realizing your potencials.

Put a smile on your face

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Smile cost nothing, but makes everybody so happy. Make them smile, and let them to feel special and you will become the best friend for them

Do not waste the powers you have

2009-05-03T01:54:00.000-07:00

I got the power to achieve anything I want. The problem is am I using it right?

Steve Pavlina gives some advices how to use, or not use your power:

Stop complaining - because all you do is just wasting you time. You better look for solution, not a complain
Self doubt - do the opposite, what would you do if you were 100% sure you will succeed in everything you will start doing and spending enought time on it?
Cowardice -
You generate fear when you send energy to what you don’t want — by thinking about it, dwelling on it, imagining it, etc.
Arguing - in most of the cases arguing is also wasting of time. May be you are right, may be your solution is better, but sometimes it is better to let other people to feel right and just make them happy. In long term relationship it could pay you back.
Asking permission - usually people are a little bit negative if you are trying to invent something new or trying to achieve more than they. You better ask for the challenge and constuctive critic but not for support and permision

Own your power!

Stop giving away your power — to other people, to your fears, to anything you don’t want. Use your power positively and creatively. Channel the tremendous energy inside of you to manifest your desires.

How to turn this theory in the practic? Next time you will face the problem, try to remember those models:

Complaining
Self doubt
Cowardice
Arguing
Asking permission

Try to use you power achieving the goal and not abusing them

PS: Steve gives us the free audio Peak Performance Paraliminal - Paul R. Scheele With Tom McCarthy

Laws of Nature, or Lighthouse Principles

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That there are Laws of Nature, or Lighthouse Principles that govern life of all creatures in the our planet.

We just might think we govern it. We may let our values govern our behavior, but the consequences of that behavior is governed by those Lighthouse Principles.

Why we are doing that we are doing? Not how determines the results we achieve.

I love saying:

We spend part of our life preparing to do something.
We spend other part of live trying to concentrate on that we are doing.
And we spend the biggest part of life doing the wrong things.

Have you tried to stop for a moment and think about it?

What are YOU becoming now and in the future?

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Wouldn't you agree that making a change at the level of
our identity would give us the most useful and pervasive
changes?

For example you could decide to become a more creative
person or a better communicator. Or both?! Whatever you
choose, pick something that energises and inspires you.

Now one things for sure, we are going to experience many
problems simply because that's reality right?

Annoying work collegues, dealing with certain family
members, traffic jams, Eastenders etc.

Isn't it true though that our experience of problems
dissappear, when we have the correct mental attitude or
state of mind.

Problems are going to keep coming, it's inevitable. To
protect ourselves from feeling overwhlemed and crushed we
need to cultivate a powerful determination to overcome all
our delusions or bad thinking patterns/habits.

So as you think about that now what does the more determined
you look like? You can use this as your 'desired self image'
in the technique below that is from "The Half Seond Rule."

Automatically Swish Yourself into New Behaviour

(This is a very powerful process that enables you to get rid
of bad feelings and unwanted behaviour that results from the
bad feeling. It's useful for all kinds of things because it
're-directionalises' your mind. It re-programs your mind to
go away from the unwanted and head towards a more
resourceful, possibility filled future!

1. Identify Context: Pick a situation that induces
undesirable feelings inside of you? Where or when would you
like to behave differently than you do now? (Examples: An
interview, asking someone out, driving onto a freeway etc.)

2. Identify Cue Image: What do you see in the above
situation just before you start doing the behaviour you
don't like? Imagine actually being in the situation, seeing
through your own eyes. To help get the cue image it can be
useful to physically do what you do just before the unwanted
behaviour. (NOTE: The cue image can be an internal image
inside your mind or an external, realworld image.)

3. Create Outcome Picture: See yourself over there as you
would look if you had already accomplished the desired
change. Make this image really compelling. How would you
stand? What would your facial expression look like? If you
had made this change how would you see yourself differently?

4. Swish: Start by seeing the cue image, big and bright.
Next put a small dark image of the outcome picture in the
lower right corner. The small dark image will grow big and
bright and cover the cue image, which will get dim and
shrink away. It can be useful to say, 'Swissssshhhh' at the
same time! (NOTE: It is very important to do the actual
swish very fast for it to be effective: LESS THAN ONE
SECOND! You can repeat the process, steps 4 - 6 and go
faster each time until you have done it in less than 1/2 a
second.)

5. Blank Out Screen or open your eyes.

6. Repeat from step 4 again five times.

7. Test: Now try and picture the cue image again. If the
swish has been effective it will be hard to do as the
outcome picture will appear automatically!

TOP TIPS: The desired self-image in step 3 doesn't need to

be perfect. The question is, do you like it better?

Inspired by Colin Smith

How to choise the way of your life?

2009-03-27T01:23:00.000-07:00

How many of you heard about Coaching?

Well in USA it is popular visit psychologist when you are facing the problems and look to you past. Found there some problems and solve them. But now there is new specialist who call them selves life trainers / couchers who gives you a look to you future and motivates you to take action by looking forward, not backward.

They gives you a vision which lets you to unlock your potentials and go for you dream. Sometime it is hard to take a decision to change your life, cause usually we do not like to leave our comfort zone. There is one exercise which lets you to make it easier.

For example you are willing to take an important decision and choose one of two ways. Take for a example one year period. Realize you this year has passed and how your life has changed within this period. What you have already achieved if chosen way 1 and way 2.

Then it is easier to decide when you see the green dot, which I associate with all the benefits, greats experience and good emotions I will get taking an action which will move me closer to my destiny.

If do not do anything I will be at the same line after a year and still be in the red position.

I hope you understand what I was trying to say to you and this point of view will help you making decisions. If NO, just leave a comment and I will answer you.

2012 - what you want to achieve till the end of the world

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We are spending to much time preparing for better life and spend so little time to live.

What would you do if you knew that you will succeed in any work you will start?

What drives you so much, you can pay money for it?

Majority of people hate their jobs, but never quits. Why? Because we trying to live like others. We do not want to try something new. We are sitting in our comfort zone where we get our salary and do not need to care about the tomorrow.

But the most successful people have quit their job and tried to found their own way to their dreams and wealth. They started to build their live when they were only students.

Have you read the biography of Bill Gates? He has not finished university untill he was not a millionaire.
Richard Branson quit school and started his business of students newspapers.
Steve Jobs dropped out after only one semester.

So when you will start achieving your own dreams? If you are not trying to achieve yours, then somebody employs you and then you are helping them to achieve their goals.

Life is short. What would you do if you would have only a few years to live? Somebody believe you have time till 2012 december 12.

Biggest looser in the world

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What is better:

get salary every month and be safe

or try to invest money and earn more. Of course there is
always risk and you will definitely loose, but at the end may be you
will find way to the wealth. You want to see the list of people who lost
18 billions dollar per year? Can you imagine how much it is
18.000.000.000? For example I live in Lithuania with 3 millions
citizens. So it's like every lithuanian lost 6000 LT per year. But dr.
Bill Gates is still richest person in the world in spite of loosing
such ammount of money.

THE BILLIONAIRES - top 5 richest people in the world on 2009 by Forbes magazine

William Gates III

Warren Buffett

Carlos Slim Helú

Lawrence Ellison

Ingvar Kamprad

Where does crisis started?

2009-03-07T06:36:00.000-08:00

Do you now how the crisis started?

If no, you must see this video. Here eveything is explained so clearly, that even I child can understand this.

The Crisis of Credit Visualized from Jonathan Jarvis on Vimeo.

Start your new life today

2009-03-06T11:45:00.000-08:00

Everybody has a dreams. How to turn them to action and results?

Well we can see what my man Anthony Robbins tells.
He offers to follow 7 simple rules.

Just remember if you want to achieve something, it is not enought just to read them, you need to take an action.

If you are ready for most amazing journey of your life, here are the 7 rules you need to follow.

Get clear, get focussed, & make it a must

Get a proven plan

Get a successful partner

Get going: calling the power of momentum

KEEP GOING! Immerse yourself, flex & progress

Give more than you expect to receive and life will always be abundant!

KEEP GOING! Immerse yourself, flex & progress

If you are intersted in such point of view you can read the original workbook of Tonny on scribd.com

New Year New Life by Athhony Robbins

Publish at Scribd or explore others: eBooks tygas

5 Wealth Lessons From 20 Percent of a Millionaire

2009-03-01T01:34:00.000-08:00

Who said you need education?

Most people start studying and then try to get a job, but I noticed what most successful entrepreneurs were dropped out from the school or university.

They really was bad at learning and was the the smartest one. They just do the things they thought are right and now we can listen to one of them.

Dr. William H Gates III